There are many modalities and schools of thought for how life coaching to use to help you move from your current situation to where you want to be, so I thought it would be a great idea to let you know where I fall on the scale of coaching.
First, let’s talk about what I believe coaching is not.
- Coaching is not Therapy. Therapy helps you deal with the things from your past in this current day.
- Coaching is not Advise Giving. While there is a level of crossover between coaching and consulting, coaching does not focus on what you think the advice is your clients need.
- Coaching is not Teaching. Again, you do a level of teaching with your clients to understand how tools work; coaching isn’t set up for just that.
Now, let me tell you where I fall in line in regard to the above:
I Teach….. Self Coaching.
I teach you the tools best for building your awareness muscles so you can see your own truth around whats really keeping you from having more of the experiences you want.
I Coach On Self Coaching.
By teaching you self-coaching skills, there is coaching involved, so you can become highly skilled at seeing your truth, mastering discernment, upleveling your energy, and decision-making.
I do not engage in therapy at all, and I don’t give advice.
I work with people who are ready to do the work to create a goal vs. people who want to heal from their past and vs. people who just want to be comforted.
Here’s an example you can relate to-
A friend comes to me talking about her problems. She’s crying and is not in a space where she WANTS to move past it. She just wants to vent. She just wants to be heard. She just wants to share what’s going on in her life. She just wants to be comforted.
As a Coach, I have sympathy for her situation. I have compassion for where she’s at, but it isn’t helpful to coach her because she’s not in a space to gain awareness that she can actually decide not to be in emotional suffering. She WANTS to be in emotional suffering.
The best thing to do is just be a listening ear, and when she’s ready, I’ll be there to teach her how to deal with those types of situations.
You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.
Now, if you have a Coaching relationship with that person and they come to you in those moments, they are there to get coached. They didn’t come to YOU, THEIR COACH expecting you to be a friend, give advice and comfort them.
They know that as their coach, you’re there to help them grow and that doesn’t always feel good!
The tools I teach help you work through ANY situation to have the outcomes you want. But there is deep work involved. Learning to see your truth takes a lot of courage and practice, but a promise I can guarantee you is that you will never look at things the same way again.
You will have an upleveled self-concept because your brain will become hardwired to see things as the truth. You may choose to ignore it, but you will have awareness of your decisions, and when you end up having to do the work anyway, you’ll be able to see that!
Not from a “woe is me” perspective but from your new core identity of awareness and wisdom.
Now listen, sometimes people need therapy, and they should get it!!
Some people need advice shared from your own experience, like baking a cake, taking a specific road at a certain time of the day because of road work, or using a particular email marketing software.
But be clear, none of that is coaching, and none of it is wrong. When I am doing any of those things, I’m aware, that I have moved out of the coaching role and NOTHING HAS GONE WRONG!
You just have to be aware of when to coach, when not to coach, and when other modalities are more helpful for that person.
I share all of this with you because I had all kind of conundrums come up when calling myself a life coach, and I wanted you to know that confusion and fear is something we all deal with, and we can learn coaching tools to move past.
Much Love,
x,Aja
Life is happening Now!
Ps. Join the DREAM CATCHERS LAB, where we take the tools and concepts you learn here, implement them, and use them to go from dream chaser to dream catcher and create anything we want! See You There. CLICK HERE TO GO TO THE DREAM CATCHERS LAB
